CFN Archives - Recruiting 2003 All-Name Team

We've unearthed some of the old CFN pieces, and with a few minor tweaks, we've kept them intact to show what the thoughts were at the time. Originally published in February of 2003, here was the always groan-inducing piece highlighting the coolest and best names in the 2003 recruiting class.

Recruiting 2011 

CFN Archives - 2003 All-Name Team

Recruiting 2011 | Recruiting 2010 | Recruiting 2009

CFN Top Prospects for 2011
- No. 1 to 50 | No. 51 to 100 | No. 101 to 150
- No. 151 to 200 |  No. 201 to 250 | No. 251 to 300
- Quarterbacks | Running Backs | Receivers
- Tight Ends | Off. Tackles | Guards & Centers 
- Def. Ends | Def. Tackles | Linebackers | Corners | Safeties 
- 2009 CFN Top 150 | 2010 CFN Top 200 

CFN Recruiting Archives
- All-Name Teams
2010 | 2009 | 2008 | 2004 | 2003 | 2002

- How To Build A Team Through Recruiting
- The 5 Star Prospects of 2006 
- The 2-Star Prospects Who Became 5-Star Players 
- The 2006 All-Recruiting Class Defense 
- The Unheralded Stars ... The 2005 Class
- Recruiting Busts ... the 2005 Class
- Recruiting Booms ... the 2005 Class
- Re-Ranking the 2004 Recruiting Classes
- Late Bloomers ... the 2004 Class
- Re-Ranking the 2003 Recruiting Classes
- Booms & Busts ... the 2003 Class
- Booms & Busts ... the 2002 Class
- The Blue Chippers ... the 2001 Class

By Pete Fiutak 

Isaiah Thomas, DL North Carolina
1) If North Carolina plays UNLV, will Thomas and Rebel WR Earvin Johnson exchange kisses at midfield before the game? 2) Would go on to destroy a once-proud Knicks franchise. 3) Has already been suspended for three games for teaching thuggish tactics to fellow Tar Heel recruits.

Monroe Weekley, DE Kansas
The short-lived publication devoted to fans of Jim J Bullock during the Too Close For Comfort years.  

Decody Fagg, WR Florida State
This falls under the no comment is possible department, but it beats out former FSU all-timer a few years ago, Craphonso Thorpe.

Marshal Ausberry, OL Virginia and Tremayne Standberry, TE Oklahoma State
The obscure 30^th and 31^st flavors that no one ever asks for a taste of.

DeJuan Tribble, DB Boston College
I almost did this once on a six-hour bus ride after slamming a Super Big Gulp. 

Marvin McCall OL, Jameel McClain CB, Larry McClain CB and Reggie McCoy, DB Syracuse
Now all the Orangemen need to get back to prominence is Dick MacPherson, Don McPherson and Donovan McNabb.

Charlston Gray, OL North Carolina
For whatever reason, this is the crayon that's always missing.

Andy Good, K West Virginia
He wouldn't have been recruited if his name was Andy Wide Right.

Guerlin Dervil, LB and Kalani Heppe, OL and Jamesly Jean, TE NC State
No lame comments here. NC State gets an award for recruiting the coolest names. 

Kenni Burns, RB Indiana
His baseball documentary was outstanding, but the jazz epic got a little dry.

Charles Emerson, DL Indiana
His MASH savvy teammates have to immediately start calling him Winchester.

Luke Stone SS, Jake Powers LB and Blake Powers, QB Indiana
Like the Simpsons episode when Homer changes his name to Max Power, with a name like these, you don't snuggle them, you strap yourself on and feel the cheese.

Ben Wyss, OL Indiana
The disastrously weak ad slogan for the Wisconsin board of tourism brought to you by the Got Milk people.

Ernest Wheelright IV, WR Minnesota
If you're going to attach Roman numerals to your name, you simply can't call yourself Ernie or Big Ern.

Tony Gonzalez, DB/WR Ohio State
Great. Now the national champs have a Pro Bowl tight end.

Steve Allen, LB Iowa State
Mildly witty, but he has to replace his bad hair piece. A master at roasts.

Dominique Flower, DB Iowa State
If the football thing doesn't work out, with this name there's always a chance at a career as a 35-year-old, mother of three, stripper from Reno. 

Matt Scherbring DL, Tom Schmeling OL, Bastian Schober OL and Taylor Schrage, LB Iowa State
Head coach Dan McCarney just hopes these guys don't schtink.

Tang Bacheyie, DB Kansas
The scouting report. Positives: Decent size, nice speed. Negatives: Bland and dissolves easily in water.

Antonio Gaines, RB Tennessee
He has no other choice but to be a running back.

Ta Ta Thompson, LB Texas A&M
Ta Ta Thompson had better be able to ta ta tackle.

Sean Young, WR California
Watch out as he drops the big pass in the Rose Bowl, turns into a woman, steals the Dolphins mascot, kidnaps Dan Marino and then gets his plot foiled by some second rate pet detective with weird hair.

Yomi Ojo, OL NC State
Can we ever forgive him for breaking up the Beatles?

Ropati Pitoitua, DL Washington State
With this last name, you'd think his parents would've given him a break and simply named him Bob.

Chijioke Onyenegecha, CB Arizona State
Get used to learning how to figure this one out cause he might be the best defensive back in America next year. I still bet that more people spell this right than Fiutak.

Lucky DeLay, DE SMU
If you can't get chicks with this name, you're simply not trying.

Ashton Youboty, CB Ohio State
We rock Youboty, rock Youboty, c'mon, get down with it gonna make ya freak. 

Chris Henry, RB Arizona
Sung to the tune of the Subway ad 
His name is Henry, Chris Henry. He's a Wildcat picked by Mackovic for 'Zona.

Digger Bujnoch, OL Cincinnati
This is what Al Bundy does in the opening of Married ... With Children.

Marquay Love, DL Houston
Moonlights as a late night R&B radio station DJ.

Early McMray III, CB Louisville
Better without the egg. The meal works with a side of hash browns and a small orange juice. 

Tasmin Knockum, RB Memphis
Don't rip on him until you've tried him

Logo Tevaseu, LB TCU
An overrated Italian dessert

Israel Route, CB Tulane
The highway that leads out of Tel Aviv.

Anthony Showers, QB Akron
We all hope so.

Sagan Atuatasi, DT Buffalo
A popular dance in the 1960s.

Ramono Flowers, RB Central Michigan
A type of foliage that has the fragrance of a vomit smelling cheese.

Olajuwon Cooper, QB Kent State
Has a heck of a baseline spin move. 

Javariour Lucy, DB Troy State 
The Telemundo version of the classic Lucille Ball show. 

Flordell Kissee, OL Kent State
Make sure you do this on Valentine's Day.

Matt Ah You, LB BYU and Quin Ah You, DL Hawaii
Excellent with a side of brown rice and a duck sauce.

Biobele Bilave-Benibo, RB Rice  
The first line of the Brazilian hockey team that was whacked 15-0 in the first round of the 2002 Olympics.

Hercules Satele OL, Tu Tui DB, Xavier Hoolulu OL and Villami Nauahi S, Hawaii 
Hawaii recruiting classes always deserve to be in an All-Name Hall of Fame.

Jesse Blair III QB, Harry Bradley III LB, and Louis Thomas III DB UL Monroe 
UL Monroe might be hoping to get III wins. 

Herb City, DB UTEP
The suburbs are thyme, cumin and oregano.